Crime and Punishment
I paid my dues
For stealing a piece of mooncake sample
When the promoter had her back against me.
How was I to know that it's quite a distance b/w the box of samples and me
It sure didn't look that way when others shove large chunks into their mouths and walked away unscathed
How was I to anticipate how flimsy the toothpick was such that the chunky piece got reduced to a bitesize one when it finally reached my mouth
How am I to envision that the auntie would do a flick with agility that can beat any gongfu master, with such perfect timing
To catch me tuck that tiny silver of mooncake in my mouth
So small I couldn't even taste wat flavour it was
Still, a theft's a theft
And I stood there meekly expecting my punishment
As she launched into a string of thick Cantonese accented Mandarin
A quick glance and assessment of me, and she recommended me the pumpkin, mixed nuts mooncakes to improve my complexion- there, there and there. See how meticulous she is, she even used her finger to point out those spots in question.
Sensing how unconvinced I was, she quipped and reiterated 3 times, that it was good for pple who needs to go on diet (a.k.a fat, a.k.a me)
Thanks auntie, thanks very much.
Seeing that I still haven't moved to take out the wallet, she goes on to wax lyrical about the box- very pretty, very presentable. Yeah. That, i gotta agree with her.
Mooncakes are very versatile. And it's very exquisite if packaged nicely in the boxes.
Can be used as gifts to parents, in-laws or, or, as wedding gifts.
Don't wait anymore, u already old enuff. Marriageable age. (= not young anymore= old)
She flashes me a brilliant smile.
Shoves me the pamphlets
Can discuss with your boyfriend and give me a call- discounts and free delivery for 20 boxes and above.
The government's call to hire middle-aged employees for their experience and wisdom really works. See how pro-active/pro-family they are? And how earnest and creative?
At the end of 12 mins, (when L finally decides to get off the phone and rescue me),
I was pricked with guilt, filled with regret for stealing
The emotional torment without her even uttering a single word of admonishment or raising her voice
When all she did was to shower, ahem, warm advice and concern
How lethal
How effective
The sly innuendo
I've realise my mistake.
I will never again steal mooncake samples. Never.
posted by Cranberrymist at 11:06 AM
10 Comments:
Haha~ this entry is so entertaining! But you shouldn't use the word "steal", to me it's really sampling, no matter I buy it or not.. :p A few weeks back, there was this mooncake promoter from a hotel who came to 29th floor.. I happened to be there skiving and was feeling hungry.. So what did I do? I squeezed in with those aunties and started sampling the mooncakes without buying any! And I didn't feel a tiny winy bit of guilt :p
haiyah, not steal lah. try mah. just that there's a trade-off. u take a bit of mooncake and u pay for it by listening to the sales pitch. hahah. u got use my famous line from the florence market not? 'can i try?' hahahah
ahem! wait a min there... why did she ask u to discuss with ur bf? who were u with? spill!
what steal!! samples are meant to be given away! no thievery involved yah! anyway, i hope it's not the brand that my co's doing.
hee hee.
wah winner lah u! this entry put a smile to my face.. it's so you... food and you. and the entries u can concort out of things like mooncake sampling. I do not have your ingenuity man! Well done babe!! - purplefreak!
Jannie: Entertaining?Sobz. At my expense! Wat the auntie said was depressing.Aniwei, wat hotel's mooncake did u try? Wat flavours? Was it good?:P
J:It's NOT a sales pitch, it's a personalised one-to-one session k. N she din offer any more samples. Miss u man- no one was there to feed me samples:P
And beats me how come she asks me abt e bf when there's none in sight. Haiz.
eeky:Hee, hope u wld be promoter someday. Then i can sample all i want:P ...and nope, dun think its your co's mooncake. Speaking of which, how does ur co's one taste like? Got discts?:P
Purplefreak: erhmm, u've got a spelling error. Haha....And i dunno why i keep getting into situations liddat lately. Not v fun.
yah, got 35% discount. i never taste before. u wanna know, go sample. ;)
but snowskin sold out liao leh. i so pissed. only the baked ones left.
Bleah...how can u resist not tasting it? I jus saw e snowskin ones at retail outlets u know?
But too bad i'm abstaining fr mooncakes for...as long as I can:P. Hee.
yah. the cheapos dun want to sell to staff at discount. wanna reap the profits. i just tried the thingy. it's v like the ones at giant. i suspect might be the same manufacturer. even the box also v alike. of cos nicer a bit lah.
but ok lah, quite fresh. and since got discount, ok lor. but now giant buy 1 get 1 free liao.
Hilarious! That's the word for your post.. haha.. wish i had as much compassion as you to stop and listen.. I usually do a quite nice "excuse".. be back later to get k! :D
But how can u stay out of the Singaporean thing of sampling!?!? It's in our blood, our culture mah.. with so much sampling ard.. it's not just limited to mooncakes you know.. how about foodies like chocolates, new drinks, free facial product samples!! You'll be missing out gal! :P
eeky:gosh...how come u r promoting another brand's mooncakes here?
Maddy:Bleah, I don't know why i cant seem to excuse myself. Always appear fake. Must have more practise. Hee:)
And disclaimer: I only said i wont take mooncake samples anymore. Ha, other samples are still v welcome:)
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