Mind Game Decoded

THE MIND GAME

Age group: All, especially noticeable in people stepping into adulthood

How to Play: Encrypting feelings and thoughts into politically correct/neutral/pleasant statements and comments

We hide, we mask, we fake, we conceal.
Sometimes consciously, other times unconsciously.
At times enjoyable, at times burdensome,
Still, we view it as something that is part and parcel of life.
Like it or grudge it, we continue to play along.
For the fear of offending, for the hope of pleasing.
To avoid rejection, to win acceptance
To fend off embarrassment and awkwardness, to acquire stylishness and slickness

Levels:

1) Novice
What begins as a gesture of humility as has been grounded in us:
To be humble, not to be pompous
To be thoughtful, not to be self-centered
To be easy going, not to be difficult
Slowly evolves from self-deprecating remarks to diplomacy
Hypocrisy slips in unnoticed
Insincerity leaves its insidious marks .

2) Intermediate
From trying to please and soothe with the 'I'm okay', I'm fine', ' I don't mind' even when one clearly isn't
To the mechanic dispensing of 'so sorry', 'doesn't matter' ,' it's alright' , 'i feel bad'
The suppression of temper, weariness and jadedness in those 'maybe', 'perhaps' and 'we'll see how it goes'
To working on squeezing out that smile- 'you're faking a smile with the coffee to go' (Daniel Powter, Bad Day)

3) Master
Feelings are muted and the mind is numbed
Others are confused as to who we are
We too are unclear of who we have become, what we want

We think we are being nice and considerate, but are taken for granted and taken advantage of
Others getting the vibes from our answers and smiles, are miffed and lost as to what went wrong and what they did wrongly


The 'hi-s' are many but the 'byes' are even more
What we want, we don't say.
What we don't want, we pretend we want
What starts out as sensitivity towards others, ends up as hurt for self and others

We want to win others over but lose ourselves
We hope to appease and placate, but end up aggravating
We seek to be understood but skirt over awkward moments by teasing and jibing
We want to help but realise how little we know of others
We have fun but can't share the tears
We are good friends but also strangers


To quit:

It's not simple- not at all.
When playing the game has become an automatic reflex.
When fingers churn out those diplomatic phrases on MSNs, SMSes and blogs
When all the 'fine' and 'alright' spring up from our mouths, without the need to think.
We can sigh...but we can also try.
To make things a little less complex, a little simpler.

Simply let your 'Yes' be 'Yes,' and your 'No,', 'No'; anything beyond this comes from the evil one. ~Matthew 5:37

Let your "Yes" be yes, and your "No," no, or you will be condemned
~James 5:12